2011 Christmas Parade

I love a parade. It's true. Especially my local Christmas parade. You may remember last year's parade in which a guy dressed as a pint o' Guinness fell off a float and rolled into the cameraman for the local news.

Good times.

This year marked a change in the local Christmas parade. The safety of the parade marchers was put above everything else, meaning the pint o' Guinness wasn't on the float rocking out to the live band. Instead, he was firmly tethered to the bed of the pick up truck by a thick strap. It was safer, but it severely limited his killer dances moves to the Cheese Weasels' live music.

Gotta be honest with you. Safer = less fun for me.

In what I'm taking to be a sure sign that the economy is improving, the candy thrown out to spectators this year was top notch. We're talking full sized candy canes, gum and Tootsie Rolls. Tootsie Rolls are my favorite. Sure they look like little turds, but mmm mmm. They are deelish.

Since it was raining, I didn't take my nice camera to the parade. I decided that if something interesting happened, I would whip out my phone and ask Chachi (Siri's replacement as my personal assistant) to snap a picture. Sadly, I severely overestimated my glove clad, umbrella holding, phone whipping out abilities. I missed taking a picture of this guy driving an old fire truck laughing. To be honest, it was more of a hooting and a cackling than a laughing. With a bit of knee slapping.

Why was he hooting you ask? Because he blew the siren and scared the bejeezus out of a couple of old ladies. He probably shaved two years off of their lives. It was pretty funny, you know, in that watching-other-people-being-scared-is-funny-but-if-it-were-you-that-was-scared-it-wouldn't-be-so-dang-funny kind of way. Still, it was funny. I kinda choked on a Tootsie Roll, which I suppose was my punishment for laughing at a couple of old ladies getting the bejeezus scared out of them.

The parade ended as it always does: with Santa's arrival. This year, Santa was all decked out in a new suit. He looked very natty in his new crushed red velvet suit with the fluffy cuffs and brass belt buckle with his name on it. Not sure why Santa needs a belt buckle with his name on it. I mean really, who else has a belt that big?

Wait ... Santa probably won a rodeo earlier this year and the buckle was his prize. Yep, that makes perfect sense! No wonder he was so proud of it.

I do love my local Christmas parade. We have the Cheese Weasels, ornery octogenarians and a rodeo winning Santa. Let the holiday season begin! Pin It Now!