My Thoughts On Raiders Of The Lost Ark

Checked another movie off of my list this past weekend: the 1981 classic, Raiders of the Lost Ark.

Now here's a movie I can get behind. Harrison Ford? Yes, please. Han Solo, Indiana Jones, it doesn't matter. Any flavor of Harrison Ford is fine.

Incidentally, Han Solo was one of my first husbands. At some point during my formative years, I was briefly married to Han Solo, Bo Duke, and Shawn Cassidy. But I digress.

I jotted down my thoughts as I watched Lost Ark, not an easy feat when balancing a giant bowl of popcorn on my lap.

Clearly, I'm gifted.

One of the first things I wrote down was 'I need a whip' because it looked pretty nifty hooked to Indy's belt. And I'm pretty confident that I have serious, as-of-yet untapped whip skills.

Two thoughts later I wrote down 'Ooooo, a monkey! I need a monkey! Wait … I need a whip and a monkey! Yes, then my life will be complete. Valentine's Day is right around the corner …'


My dreams of getting a whip and a monkey for Valentine's Day were dashed when I yelled a question to my husband of nearly seventeen years.

Me: Does the volume need to be this high?

Him (looking aghast): Yes!

I shot him a puzzled look.

Him (reverently): It's a Lucas Sound film. Of course it has to be loud.

Me (still puzzled): What does Lucas Sound mean?

Him (slapping himself on the forehead): Seriously? Are you kidding me right now? You're not kidding, are you?

We had to pause the movie so I could google Lucas Sound and learn why the crap the sound had to be up loud enough so that George Lucas himself could tell that we were watching one of his flicks.

The final nail in the getting-a-whip-and-a-monkey-for-Valentine's-Day coffin was when I repeatedly asked questions during the movie:

• This movie takes place in 1936 and I see rubber bands. Did they even have rubber bands in the 30s?
• Were there automatic weapons in 1936? Wait ... duh. Yes there were.
• Is there any more popcorn? I'm almost out.
• For crying out loud, can we turn down the volume before my ears start to bleed?
• Heck no! I'm not going to cover my head with my Snuggie. Why would I do that? Wait. Is there a scary part coming up? Tell me if there's a scary part coming up. Oh geez, I so don't want this movie to be disturbing.

To recap: Watched Raiders of the Lost Ark and loved it. Harrison Ford is easy to look at, parts of the plot were very Scooby Doo (always a plus), and that theme music is genius. Pure genius. It stuck with me for the remainder of the weekend and I've asked my family repeatedly to hum it whenever I do something heroic. Like make dinner or locate the remote control.

So far,  they've declined. Pin It Now!