Meeting The Pioneer Woman

Thursday night I had a very rare opportunity to meet one of my idols. My blogging idol, to be exact. Her name is Ree Drummond and she writes cookbooks, hosts a cooking show on Food Network, home schools her four kids, and helps to run a cattle ranch with her husband and his family. And when she has the time, she blogs at www.thepioneerwoman.com. I highly, highly recommend you check out her blog. It's so worth the trip, man. Pinky swear.

A town about an hour's drive from my house was hosting a book signing to celebrate The Pioneer Woman's latest cookbook. Since you all know how much I love an autograph, I simply had to go. My entire family, my husband, myself, and our two daughters, pulled up in the parking lot right when the event started, at 4 o'clock on the dot.

I paused for a moment before exiting the car to fluff my hair and dab on some lipstick. There's no need to look homeless when meeting one's idol, is there? Besides, this is An Occasion. Fluffing the locks and donning some lipstick are mandatory.

Sadly, my fluffing and primping session was for naught. I had no idea that we'd be in line for four and a half hours. Two hundred and seventy minutes.

Most of that time was spent waiting outside the building in the 82 degree heat. With the sun beating down. About an hour in, it was official. I was a hot, sweaty mess. The fluffy locks were limp. The lipstick had long since melted off. Pretty sure I smelled. And not in a good way.

A storm started to build and the winds came. The wind cooled off the air temperature and the clouds blocked the sun, but it turned me from a hot, sweaty, stinky mess into a stinky mess with wind whipped hair.

Good grief.

Four and a half hours, all for twenty seconds with Ree. She was totally worth the wait. I will gladly trade four and a half hours for another twenty second opportunity with her. Hopefully, I will have it more together the second time around than I did the first.

I had twenty seconds with Ree. Twenty seconds in which I forgot everything witty and slightly charming thing I was going to say to her. Twenty seconds in which I forgot every compliment, every anecdote, and every thought I ever had while standing in that long line.

Twenty seconds to pray to God that she didn't smell me.

Behold. The stinky mess with wind whipped hair.

But Ree? She was lovely, delightful, and gracious. And if she noticed my stench, she never let it show.

I don't know how she remained so lovely after signing autographs for four and a half hours, but she did. Since I was momentarily unable to speak, she asked my girls a few questions. They were able to form words, unlike their mother who stood there alternating between praying she didn't smell and grinning like a fool. Ree genuinely seemed thrilled to sign our books.

While four and a half hours was a long time to stand in line, I can't imagine what it was like for her to sit there and sign her name for that amount of time. I believe that it would be quite a mentally draining experience. Her fatigue must be so much greater than my own. It may be of little consolation, but I'm pretty sure her locks fared far better than my own.

And she smelled better than me, too.

But I so, so appreciate the opportunity to meet her. I appreciate that she came to my often overlooked state. I appreciate the fact that she signed autographs until the very last person left, which I'm guessing was at least an hour after my family and I departed. I appreciate the time and effort it takes personally from her and her family to do these kind of events.

And I loved that she did so with a laugh and a smile.

Thanks, Ree. 

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