I Used to Be Smart

Once upon a time in a far away land (1987) I was smart.

No, seriously. I was smart.

I was on the Honor Roll all through High School and was on the Dean's List (Honor Roll for the college set) every semester but one at BSU.

I have the certificates and everything.

Then something happened and I done lost my smarts. Not all my smarts, just some. I'm still smart enough to know that I'm not as smart as I used to be.

Make sense?

Good. You are officially smarter than me.

I'll give you a certificate and everything.



I realized that my smartness was slipping last night after a school supplies shopping trip to Target. I made an error on the supply list. I thought it was a minor error, but was informed by a very upset and slightly hostile child that what I had purchased was not on the list and therefore had to be exchanged for the item that was on the list.

My faux pas? I didn't realize there was a difference and purchased two fine point Sharpie markers instead of two ultra-fine point Sharpie markers.

*insert hands to heart or bosom clasping or fanning of the face or screaming "The horror! The horror!" repeatedly or whatever it is that you do when shocked and appalled


Today I got to return the fine points for the ultra-fine points and when asked "Why are you returning these? Is there something wrong with them?" by the Service Department worker, my lovely child piped up and said in a very solemn tsk-tsk kind of voice "She bought the wrong markers because she didn't know the difference between fine and ultra-fine point".

This statement was accompanied by a slight head shake and a small sigh.

Lovely.

Yep. I used to be smart. I'm afraid those days, like the ones with a flat stomach, no wrinkles, and perky boobs, are gone. Pin It Now!